I am sad.
I dont know how to describe my feelings for you now. I don't know what we are. I miss you a lot, but I know it's different for you. Your feelings are fading away. You'll not remember what we had. You'll leave me. You'll forget about me.
Do you know what it feels like to know that nothing's going to change no matter how hard you try? Nothing's going to change no matter how long you wait?
I tried, I failed. I tried again, only to know i'll never be able to achieve it...ever.
What can I do?
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
This is it.
How should I start?
I guess, a 1 year chase has finally come to an end. You told me what you really felt, I've told you what I really felt, but it's not for the better if we get together. Okay. I get it.
I dont think there's anything else that I can do or say to make you change your mind. I guess your decision's final.
I don't think I would go back to disliking you or whatever. The reason that all happened because I felt this unsatisfaction in me, that there was no closure. This, there is. I think.
This, by far has been the most complicated "thing" ever that has ever happened to me. I had to think hard, think even harder and now, to not think of it at all. This "thing" made me feel like a 40 year old woman, deciding on things. I'm still young I guess, and you're more matured than I am. I can't think the way you do, I don't want things like how you want them. I'm more for the puppy love, you're more for the serious one I think.
We have so many opposites, nothing much in common. I have so much to say to you, but I don't know you have that much to say to me. We lost the first chance, we're losing this second one.
I want you, you want me(maybe, Idk) but it's impossible to be together. Such a tragic story kan?
Macam drama Tv pulak.
Saya pernah hampir mencintaimu, namun ku sedar bahawa kau tidak boleh membalasnya.
Ku tahu ia tidak akan bertahan lama, tetapi ku tahu ku tidak akan menyesal kerana tidak mencubanya. Kau sendiri yang berkatakan begitu. Tetapi kamu tidak mengikuti kataanmu.
Baiklah. Ku akan teruskan hidupku ni tanpa memori pahit manis bersamamu.
I actually did write a song. It was never completed.
Saya tidak marah, saya bukan tak puas hati, saya tidak apa-apa. Saya faham.
Goodbye, goodnight. :)
I guess, a 1 year chase has finally come to an end. You told me what you really felt, I've told you what I really felt, but it's not for the better if we get together. Okay. I get it.
I dont think there's anything else that I can do or say to make you change your mind. I guess your decision's final.
I don't think I would go back to disliking you or whatever. The reason that all happened because I felt this unsatisfaction in me, that there was no closure. This, there is. I think.
This, by far has been the most complicated "thing" ever that has ever happened to me. I had to think hard, think even harder and now, to not think of it at all. This "thing" made me feel like a 40 year old woman, deciding on things. I'm still young I guess, and you're more matured than I am. I can't think the way you do, I don't want things like how you want them. I'm more for the puppy love, you're more for the serious one I think.
We have so many opposites, nothing much in common. I have so much to say to you, but I don't know you have that much to say to me. We lost the first chance, we're losing this second one.
I want you, you want me(maybe, Idk) but it's impossible to be together. Such a tragic story kan?
Macam drama Tv pulak.
Saya pernah hampir mencintaimu, namun ku sedar bahawa kau tidak boleh membalasnya.
Ku tahu ia tidak akan bertahan lama, tetapi ku tahu ku tidak akan menyesal kerana tidak mencubanya. Kau sendiri yang berkatakan begitu. Tetapi kamu tidak mengikuti kataanmu.
Baiklah. Ku akan teruskan hidupku ni tanpa memori pahit manis bersamamu.
I actually did write a song. It was never completed.
Saya tidak marah, saya bukan tak puas hati, saya tidak apa-apa. Saya faham.
Goodbye, goodnight. :)
Monday, October 12, 2009
Would you believe me?
No matter how I think that you ain't worthy of me trying, still I want to make you happy. Why is that? I want to be the one to put on that smile on your face.
Goodnight.
Goodnight.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Ou em gee.
A friend of mine, recently got together with one of my seniors from my secondary school. And the guy she's with, used to be close to Mr.Monster. Mr.Monster is the guy that I have not seen since 13 years old. He was in my school for 1 year, he was Form 5, I was Form 1. He finished school and left. I had a major crush on him. Until today, I couldn't find anything about him and no one knew anything about him. But then my friend told me he's studying overseas and as a Birthday gift, she's gonna help me find him on facebook or whatever. Haha, okay I sound so stalker-ish. But it's Mr.Monster! MR.MONSTER! Alright, the name's not that attractive but really, he had the most charming smile everrrr and those sepet eyes. I just want to know how he looks like now. Eww or OOO.
Mr.Monster, wherever you are, if you still look like how you did 6 years ago or better, I wish you well. <3
Mr.Monster, wherever you are, if you still look like how you did 6 years ago or better, I wish you well. <3
Ahhh Fish.
Slap slap the face, hit hit the head,
Let it be red, dont care if it bleeds,
Got to stop, stop thinking now,
Got to stop rushing now.
Got to stop. Fullstop.
Back to square one? Oh no,
Going ahead without being sure? Oh shit,
What to think? Fuck it!
What to say? Plenty!
What should I do? Something?
Da da da da da da da,
du du du du du du du,
la la la la la la la,
lu lu lu lu lu lu lu,
Fuck it!
Be the first to move,
or be the one to wait,
I really dont care,
Cause it's what I just hate.
Hate, hate, hate!
I don't want to be black,
Don't want to be on the bed,
With my jazzy music blasting in my head,
Listening to the songs with a heart ache.
No. This is not a song. It's just babbles.
Kapooosh.
Let it be red, dont care if it bleeds,
Got to stop, stop thinking now,
Got to stop rushing now.
Got to stop. Fullstop.
Back to square one? Oh no,
Going ahead without being sure? Oh shit,
What to think? Fuck it!
What to say? Plenty!
What should I do? Something?
Da da da da da da da,
du du du du du du du,
la la la la la la la,
lu lu lu lu lu lu lu,
Fuck it!
Be the first to move,
or be the one to wait,
I really dont care,
Cause it's what I just hate.
Hate, hate, hate!
I don't want to be black,
Don't want to be on the bed,
With my jazzy music blasting in my head,
Listening to the songs with a heart ache.
No. This is not a song. It's just babbles.
Kapooosh.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Celebrities
Women I love
1) Gwen Stefani
2) Alicia Keys
3) Norah Jones
4) Kate Moennig
5) Ellen Page
6) Meg Ryan
7) Alicia Silverstone
Men I love
1) Josh Harnett
2) Brian Molko
3) Jude Law
4) Joaquin Phoenix
5) Rob Lowe
6) Jeffrey Dean Morgan
1) Gwen Stefani
2) Alicia Keys
3) Norah Jones
4) Kate Moennig
5) Ellen Page
6) Meg Ryan
7) Alicia Silverstone
Men I love
1) Josh Harnett
2) Brian Molko
3) Jude Law
4) Joaquin Phoenix
5) Rob Lowe
6) Jeffrey Dean Morgan
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